Armenian Women, Irish Men Voted “Sexiest” on Earth


Armenians women and their wide birthin’ hips have waddled into the #1 spot as the sexiest women in the world in a new poll.

The poll was taken among the members of Miss. Travel, a “travel dating” site that caters to men who have more money than charm and for women who have less dignity than money.

Armenian women look like a pear had sex with a cello then gained 30 pounds.

Countless national television, print and radio outlets picked up on the story and spread the news far and wide: “far” as inĀ  how much it was fetched, and “wide” like Armenian women’s birthin’ hips, just to make it clear from earlier. Armenian women look like a pear had sex with a cello then gained 30 pounds.

Just ten years ago, Americans might have thought an Armenian was a follower of 16th century Dutch Reformed theologian Jacobus Arminius. But now with the fame of the kurvacious Kardashian klan, Khloe, Kim, and Kortney, who kombined have fucked more black men than any other group in America with the initials KKK, Armenian women in America are as popular as they were in the Ottoman Empire among Turkish rapists.

Proving the validity of the polling method, the same poll ranks Irish men as the most desirable men in the world. Because it is common knowledge that women love pasty skin, red hair, and “The Irish Curse,”, also known as the “Irish Inch”.

Logically, that would make half Irish, half Armenian coach of the USC Trojan football team Steve Sarkisian an Adonis, a god among mortals upon whose face one could not gaze without bursting into flames. …Quick! Avert thine eyes, foolish mortals…!

Avert thine Eyes Foolish Mortals

Discussion11 Comments

The Paper Ladle Discussion Policy

Discussion is webcome and encouraged. The Paper Ladle edits comments for grammar, spelling, in addition to style, diction, rhythm, meter, and also substance. Racist, sexist, and hateful comments will not be allowed unless they are generally true or hilarious. The Paper Ladle is not responsible for lost or stolen items. In case of contact with eyes, rinse immediately with plenty of water and seek medical advice. Not recommended for interior use on large surface areas. If swallowed, do not induce vomiting.

  1. JWash aka CHUNKY SOUP

    Dis J-Wash from around da block hollerin at yall fine ass Arm-hos

    Dey call me Chunky Soup cuz i fill you up right… Armhos down 4 whatev call me on my boost mobile phone @ 818-xxx-7630

Leave A Reply

Leave a Reply